Well lately i've been moody a lot lately . everyone's busy except for me i only have one class i do , and one once a week job. I run errands driving sometimes which has ups and downs as well with driving with my dad. and sometimes hang out with people but it's rare. i am going to church but haven't connected with people my age that well. i want to scream at the leaders why don't you have small groups why are there older people why not have it split? why don't you encourage more friendliness? i can't go all the time, and people don't remember me that much. seems groupy. everyone is dressed nicely . we sit in a circle facing each other . there's like 20 people.. and uggh. but i still go when i can . i don't have work don't know when to make my classes at rccc. after rccc still not sure where i am going to transfer too how that will work . will i be able to handle all the school i have to do ? will i be able to find a good paying job after school? both my sisters have a significant other. i haven't hand a boyfriend in almost a year. a lot of people want me to move to the northwest and i wish i could too. or that i stayed longer. if it weren't for my job if i knew before how i would feel... i would have changed my ticket till like deccember. i've seen mh once , ja once , mu (uggh) a few times. kay stays a bit but is talking to thomas on phone or doing school or wedding stuff on computer . she then leaves or work, wedding stuff or to go see thomas and hang out at the pinckeys. adele comes by sometimes tells me i need to get contacts and change my hair and have a makeover. the only friend i enjoy a lot is jg who i work with . was supposed to see mo but he was a no show.

LM is busy with school and stuff. and she's got her own life. and i miss her like crazy. but i'm trying not to stay on facebook too much. she doesn't get much texting and we both don't have very many phone minutes and dumb time change as when it's 9 here it's 6 there hw or cooking dinner sometimes still in class.

music keeps me sane. i do have stuff on my to do list so it's not like i'm bored. i watch movies on tv and youtube and apply for jobs write letters have stuff . i go walks which is really enjoy and want to do more . i wish i had done one today . but i didn't and then it was dark. yesterday i took a walk and saw an anthill . i poked it with a small stick and they all ran around worried for their nest. such a small hole.reminds me of how i don't have to worry because God has all of my worries with friends, school, job, money, future and all of life, He-the God of the univierse knows about them knows what's best for me and loves me and nothing can separate me from that. He is going to take care of me. I just need to follow him